“For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.” II Thessalonians 3:10
The past two weekends before this last one had been so packed full of fun activities that I did not have time to let my usual ‘I hate work’ depression set in and keep me upset. This last weekend started out much the same with a nice potluck dinner at a friend’s house followed by attending a funny play ‘Southern Baptist Sissies’. The weekend slowly went downhill from there though. Saturday I discovered that my phone and internet services are completely out, and probably will not be restored for at least a week. On Sunday, Martin and I drove to Cullman to carry flowers to Lee’s gravesite. His 53rd birthday would have been on March 30th. Yes, those two days were the perfect set-up for my usual end of the weekend funk.
Does everyone hate their job, or is it just me? I know in the work climate that we all live in that I should be ecstatic to have a job of any kind. I have worked at the same company for over 25 years now. For 24 of those years, I did the same job one I knew like the back of my hand. There was absolutely no thinking involved. A lot of the jobs at our company are being moved to Texas, so about a year ago to preserve my employment I moved into a different department. I took a much harder job, with longer work hours for no more pay. Well we all no the ‘cannot teach an old dog new tricks’ statement, and in my case that has certainly been the truth.
The worse part of this job however is not the fact that most of it is way over my head complicated, but that I have to now on a regular basis deal with users both here and in Texas for whom I program. I am so incredibly introverted that I will sit at my desk for hours getting nothing done just dreading a 5 minute face-to-face meeting with someone. I waste so much time trying to figure out ways to get my job done through e-mails rather than vocally. Add that to the fact that all of us who work here know we are living on borrowed time. The day will come either sooner or later when all our jobs are moved to Texas. The scariest part of that is that it could happen today or 5 years from now without warning.
I know that not only do people have to work to survive, but according to God people should work. He expects everyone to earn their way in this world He has given to us. I have no problem with that with the proof that I have worked at the same company for all these years, and have always been considered by my bosses and co-workers to be an exemplary employee. My largest problem with my job is that I constantly worry about it. At night, I lie in bed thinking about what I have to get done at work the next day, and scared that I am going to be too tired to perform because of my lack of sleep. On weekends I find it hard to make myself do anything enjoyable because I am constantly dreading the following Monday. If only I could learn to leave the worries of this job at the door, I think I would be able to take a large step toward my overall happiness. If only…those words make up so much of my life.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
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I wish I had something thoughtful or meaningful to say. I've enjoyed some work, hated other work, but I've never found the real meaning of my life in work. Work has always been something done to provide for what's truly important. That said, I have found my relationships with co-workers to be a very important part of my life.
ReplyDeleteWe all worry. I worried the first time my company announced a force reduction. Eventually, after several rounds over 2 1/2 years, my job was eliminated. However, I stopped worrying, realizing that all I could do was work hard and to my best. I am not in control of what other people think or do. It's hard to not worry. I struggle with it, but I've learned to let go of so much.
I can't give you any real advice, except to say work on finding joy and fulfillment in your life, and letting go of those things that are out of your control. Know that whatever comes your way, you can find your way through it.